The Canyon inside me
I took a deep breath. Tomorrow would be the day.
I could feel the nervousity and excitement moving in my abdominal area.
How would it be? Would I manage?
We were standing on the balcony of the Grand Canyon Lodge at the North rim of Grand Canyon, Arizona. We - this is my mom, my dad, and me.
Tomorrow, we would fulfill one of my dad's biggest dreams of his life:
a rim-to-rim hike-through of Grand Canyon.
I remembered the ranger's warnings and advice he had given us hours before. We had gone to the ranger station to get our permits for camping in the gorge. (Yes, this is an obligatory paper you need if you decide to go into the canyon and stay there with your tent. To lear more about smart things to know about these epic Grand Canyon through-hikes, have a look into my post "Through-hiking Grand Canyon - the Guide".) Thinking back to this my nervousity came alive with another roar. This would be something very big. Something I'd never done before.
But for now, I wanted to take in the amazing and stunning landscape. I was amazed by his beautiful colors. The shadows and the highlights on the rocky landscape, merging into each other and standing out in sharp contrasts at the same time.
A deep feeling of inner stillness and connection - almost inimacy - to this place was there, alongside with the excitement, the doubts and the nervousness. I couldn't figure out how this could be possibly happening. Feeling everything at the same time it felt like an emotinal rollercoaster to me.
A breath.
Another.
The sky getting darker, the colors changing into some deeper and darker nuances.
I could hear the first crickets beginning to sing their symphony of night.
This sound in my ears, we had back to our little wooden hut located in the forest surrounding the North Rim Lodge. And with the emotional rollercoaster inside me and the crickets' sympony outside I fell into a restless sleep.
First steps
Calling it a heavy night would be a total understatement.
Looking back, it seems to me that this night has been one of my worst - according to how refreshed and open for the new day to come I usually would feel after a good night's sleep. But when my alarm went off at 4 am in the morning it felt almost like a relief to me. Finally, I would be able to bring this bunch of energy which was buzzing inside me into some sort of direction and into the final preparations - and in one hour finally onto the path.
The final preparations went somewhat quickly and in silence. Still half asleep I managed to pack my backpack with everything I had displayed on the bed before. Yet, I felt a little clumsy and like a newbie, going onto my first big backpacking trip - starting with a through-hike of a gorge.
At around 5.15 am we reached the trailhead of North Kaibab Trail. This trail would be our "home" for the next hours until we would reach the Bright Angel Campground at the bottom of Grand Canyon.
It was still dark so that we had to take out our headlights we had brought with us. My boots on my feet felt heavy and my backpack carrying the tent and 4 liters of water was not very enjoyable either. But I was determined to take on the challenge and now I wanted to do this.
My parents and I looked into each others faces. Or, more precisely, we tried to but got blinded by our headlights. Classical beginner's mistake, I admit. ;)
The first step onto the trail. My second boot joining. Now I'm on the trail.
I feel the weight and the gravity of my backpack. I try to find my balance in alignment with the backpack.
I can hear the the hiking poles click with every step I take.
I see our headlights dancing in the dark and forming a mysterious cone of light.
A diffuse cloud of fine dust and sand is dancing infront of us.
My breath comes heavy with all the dust around me.
So here I am now.
For some days leaving everything behind.
And entering into a different world.
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